Tag Archives: personal development

How to Get Back in the Groove After a Break from Work


Posted by Amanda Abella

 

 

 

 

 

Park Benches

The past couple of weeks have been rough for many of us – we all went back to work after a glorious break.

Sure, we were refreshed and excited for a New Year, but the fact remains that it is very difficult to go back to work after a vacation. This is true for those of us who work in the traditional world and, from my experience, especially true for those of us with entrepreneurship projects.

For some reason – though we may feel refreshed – it’s difficult to focus and get back in the groove. I walked into work last Tuesday morning and it was like I’d completely forgotten what I do. I had very little motivation despite the fact that I actually like my job (how many people can say that, right?).

So how do we get back in the groove after a break? How do we buckle down and focus? Below you’ll find a few tips to get you started.

1. Shift your perspective.

There’s no reason we should hate waking up in the morning. Actually, the very fact that we’re alive and could wake up in the morning is enough to put a smile on our faces.

Unfortunately, however, sometimes work is just that – work. Even those of us who enjoy our work on most days sometimes find ourselves begrudgingly going to the office. It doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with us – after all we’re human and our emotions change – it just means we need to shift our perspective a bit.

Rather than dreading the thought of going to work and focusing on the negative – start focusing on the positive aspects of it. Best-selling author and motivational speaker Gabrielle Bernstein recently wrote a post on The Daily Love entitled Spirit Junkie’s Top 12 Tips for Happiness in 2012. In it she emphasized the importance of changing your perspective:

Tip 2: Change the conversation. Make a resolution to change your dialogue about fear and negativity. When you think, talk and act from a negative place, you attract negativity into your life. Commit to a new conversation. Begin the New Year talking and thinking about what you love about your life rather than replaying the same old negative story. You might just be surprised by the results.

(You can find out more about Gabrielle Bernstein, her story and how she began shifting her perspective on life by watching her Authors@Google Talk. )

2. Make a to-do list the night before.

I have found that making a to-do list the night before helps me clear my head and be organized when I walk into work in the morning. It gives me a starting point instead of just trying to sporadically figure out what I have to do when I get in there.

Also, I try to put no more than 3 big to-dos for the on the list. These are the three things that MUST get done that day when I’m not conducting interviews (i.e. invoices, calling candidates for a second interview, scheduling interviews). It ensures that you won’t feel overwhelmed by task overload and also leaves room for all the little things that pop up throughout the day – like running a credit card or writing receipts.

3. Don’t multi-task.

My boss recently showed me an article that was published in The Miami Herald back in August. It was all about how multi-tasking saps creativity. Having grown up in a generation where multi-tasking meant you were efficient, she was kind of in shock. However, it didn’t take her long to realize the truth behind the concept.

If you spread yourself out to thin you end up half-assing everything. You also miss out on actually be present in what you are doing – causing stress and chatter in the brain.

Focus on doing just one thing at a time. Leo Babauta, the mastermind behind Zen Habits, puts it wonderfully when he states:

If you’re washing a dish, do it slowly, and feel every sensation. If you’re eating a fruit, taste it, feel the textures, be mindful of your hunger or lack of it. If you’re writing something, pour your heart into that writing, become the writing, inhabit the words.

Just do.

(P.S. I highly recommend reading the entire post, The Zen of Doing. It’s a goody, I promise!)

4. Work for an hour, take a break.

I started incorporating this technique this week after reading about the importance of taking breaks from work. After a while of working our minds simply need to rest. I have personally found that getting some work done for an hour  at a time and taking 10 minute breaks in between helps me manage the to-do list more efficiently.

5. Do things you actually WANT to do when you’re not in the office.

I recently wrote a post about how it’s easy to get stuck in a mundane routine when we’re working. I emphasized how many people live their lives doing the same thing everyday without really feeling fulfilled. This generally tends to put us in a horrible mood as we go day in and day out without any change.

Make it a point to dedicate some time to the things YOU want to do. You’re not in the office or slaving away on your laptop 24 hours a day – so take advantage of the time you have! Maybe you’d like to take up a dance class, use your time to start exercising or do something as simple as write in a journal. Whatever it is, make sure to dedicate some time to yourself and things you would like to experience.

Going back to work doesn’t have to be a dreadful experience. With the right balance you can enjoy your day and even get some things done!

What do you do to get back in the groove?

Image via Chris_J

Amanda Abella

Amanda Abella is a Gen Y blogger, freelance writer and recruiter in training based out of Miami, FL. She is also the author of Grad Meets World: The First Year Out of College and can be found writing for Brazen Careerist, SheNow and more.


The Importance of Not Getting Stuck in the Mundane + 5 Tips for Work/Life Balance


Posted by Amanda Abella

 

 

 

Unfortunately, many of us seem to have the same routine day in and day out.

Wake up, drink some coffee, (some people begrudgingly) go to work , come home, watch TV, go to bed, repeat.

People spend most of their lives doing the same crap over and over again – and quite frankly I find this incredibly frustrating.

Take it from someone who conducts countless job interviews each day, there is an over abundance of average people in the world. Average people who didn’t do anything spectacular, never did what they actually wanted, put up with a crappy boss and spend half a job interview complaining about it. They feel stuck or like they’re just another cog in the wheel. They feel like their lives flew past them while they were hunched over a desk only to get laid off because of budget cuts or the recession.

The truth is I’m petrified of turning into most of the people I interview. But the fact of the matter remains that most of us have to work – money doesn’t grow on trees and nothing is free. It’s also a fact that work isn’t a bad thing – what’s bad is getting stuck in a mundane routine.

So this year I challenge you to take advantage of the time you have when you’re not in the office. Use your lunch hour to go on a walk. Use your nights to take up a dance class you’ve always wanted to take, do some physical activity or start a side business. Wake up early in the morning to meditate, write or go for a run. Use your weekends to try something you’ve never done before.

Do whatever is is that you’ve always wanted to do, but felt like you never had the time because of work.

There is life outside of the office – embrace it! Below you’ll find some tips to do just that.

1. Make a list of your passions, hobbies and/or interests. Then put them in order of importance.

Some people have so many things they want to do they don’t even know where to start. Making a list will help you visualize what you want to do. It will also help you organize them into a system you can later use follow, that way you aren’t unfocused and sporadic.  Consider it a like a short term bucket list.

2. Research how to make it happen.

Saying you’re going to do something is the easy part. Unfortunately when it comes to actually doing them we more often than not fall off the horse. After making a list take a look at it and see what needs some research.

For instance, maybe you want to take a crafting class at your local community college. In this case your next step would be to check the roster and see what’s available and what it will cost. If you want to do yoga, Google local studios and take a look at their schedule. If you want to start a side business research what you need to get started.

3. Action!

Once you’ve figured out what you want to do and how and where to do it you have to actually make an effort to act on it. Put a reminder on your phone, put a big red circle on your calendar, put it on the fridge, whatever.  I personally use my Erin Condren Life Planner for just about everything.

If showing up somewhere after work for the first time is really that difficult for you figure out some sort of accountability system, like giving yourself a treat for actually having shown up. You can also try making a list of benefits that will result from partaking in new activities as a form of motivation (I.E. If I go to the gym I will get healthier).

I understand that after work we’re tired and probably lazy (believe me, I’ve been there many a time). As a result it’s difficult to actually act on the things we want to do. However, the benefits (clearer head, breaking from a routine, break from work, experiencing new things, better mood) far outweigh the tiny inconveniences you may experience at first. Remember, the hardest part is showing up the first time – it’s smooth sailing after that!

4. Create a savings plan if money is an issue.

Sometimes money gets in the way of we want to do. The key is to prioritize and learn how to budget for the things you want to try.

For instance, I have an entire savings account dedicated to yoga. With each paycheck I put away a small amount that will later be used for classes, workshops and maybe even props and downloads.

For help on creating a savings plan check out a guest post I wrote for The Real Post Grad.

5. Go with a friend.

If one of your friends will be joining I bet you’ll feel more inclined to start trying new things. Your friends can also hold you accountable so that you don’t get back into a boring routine. By the same token you can also hold them accountable :)

As human beings we can’t always be stuck in the same boring routine. Our minds and bodies crave a break every once in a while. Your perspective could also use some beneficial changes to your routine – it really makes a difference to know that you are actively learning new things, going after things you’ve always wanted to do and that you have a life outside of the office.

Image via tibchris

Amanda Abella

Amanda Abella is a Gen Y blogger, freelance writer and recruiter in training based out of Miami, FL. She is also the author of Grad Meets World: The First Year Out of College and can be found writing for Brazen Careerist, SheNow and more.


Why You Shouldn’t Care What Others Have to Say + Kicking Your Inner Critic in the Gonads


Posted by Amanda Abella

yoga star
There’s always one thing that boggles my mind whenever I go to a yoga class (which has been a lot lately). That thing is when the instructor tells me to set an intention.

Usually I have no idea what to do. There are so many things I could possibly want and certainly several things I need – how am I supposed to narrow it down to just one so that I can focus my energy for the next hour and a half?

Naturally when I went to a free class on New Year’s and was asked to set an intention for the year my mind went completely and utterly blank. After some further explanation from the awesome instructor – you can pick more than one word, it can be abstract, etc. – I finally picked three intentions I will try to cultivate this year (apparently I like things in threes): love, peace and confidence.

By love I mean compassion and charity toward others (and myself – I’m particularly hard on myself). By peace I mean less stress and more smiling. And by confidence I mean trusting myself – and I guess life, the Universe, God, whatever – more.

Then I start thinking whether or not those intentions are stupid and start making fun of myself for being such a sap. I then think about what other people may think of my intentions and really start to think I’m a sorry sap – completely missing the point of the exercise, of course.

Goals are kind of the same way. There’s SO MUCH we want to do as Millenials. We want to have a job we love. We want to be creative. We want to explore and go on adventures. We want to finally be healthy. We want to make enough money to sustain ourselves.

Unfortunately we tend to also want some sort of affirmation that we are on the right path. When we don’t get it we start second guessing ourselves wondering if we’re doing the right thing.

That is how I spent much of 2008 to about halfway through 2011 – completely stressed out over life wondering if I made the right decisions. I kept looking for affirmation in all the wrong places. I was pretty down in the dumps the last two years I was in college as a result of it. In fact, it wasn’t until relatively recently when I started feeling comfortable in my own skin again.

I never realized that the only affirmation I ever really needed was my own. I never realized that everyone has a different path – and what works for others may not work for me. I never realized that at the end of the day I have to do what makes me happy and makes me feel fulfilled – regardless of what anyone has to say about it.

Because, really, at the end of the day, who gives a shit what anyone has to say about what YOU want to do? You want to start a business? Do it. You want to run a 5k? Do it. You want to move the other side of the world? Do it. You want to put off marriage and kids? Do it. You want to bypass having kids all together? Do that too.

We have one life to live and it’s really too damn short to be worrying about what others say about our goals.

The same goes for your inner critic. I’d say most of the time I’m the one creating scenarios of impending doom in my head. I’m the one assuming that other people may think I do ridiculous things. I’m the one doubting myself. I’m the one creating my own mental suffering.

And so it’s about time that we all kick our nagging inner critic in the gonads. We need to stop doubting ourselves and just do what we feel we were put on this earth to do.

And so I leave you with some sweet tools to help you identify your inner critic and kick his/her ass.

7 Signs Your Gremlin is In the Driver’s Seat of Your Life – Your Kick Ass Life

Wrestling With a Big Decision? New Template at Your Service! – Life After College

Get the Conversation Out of Your Head – The Boomerang Kid

Silencing the Voice that You’re a Fraud – WSJ

5 Immediate and Easy Ways to Silence Your Inner Critic – Tiny Buddha

How Are You Dancing With Life? – Elephant Journal

Love Your Self - Ophelia’s Web

3 Ways to Handle Fear (Video) – Sensophy

 

Image via Pedro Moura Pinheiro

Amanda Abella

Amanda Abella is a Gen Y blogger, freelance writer and recruiter in training based out of Miami, FL. She is also the author of Grad Meets World: The First Year Out of College and can be found writing for Brazen Careerist, SheNow and more.


To Move Out or Not to Move Out + a Moving Out Template!


Posted by Amanda Abella

supersize apartment therapy
I kind of pride myself on the fact that I figure stuff out on my own. I adapt, I work hard and I do what I want. Most of all I am usually pretty damn resourceful.

After over a year of living back in my parent’s house I’m starting to think it’s about time I move out on my own. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind living with my family. They’re great and they give me space. They’ve also been kind enough to let me stay while I was a clueless grad looking for work. Then they let me stay while I had unstable work. If it were up to them I could stay here until I have enough saved up for a downpayment on a house.

But now I have steady income coming in. And I have money socked away. And I know how to make extra money should I ever need it. And I really miss the feeling of independence I had when I was living in Naples.

It’s really  incredible how I felt more independent at 20 than I do now at nearly 24. I miss feeling self-reliant. Moving back after being on my own for four years has certainly been an adjustment, and I’m starting to feel it’s high time I stand on my own two feet again.

So naturally I need to do some serious planning here – after all, planning is what I do best. That and templates.

Income

Figure out how much you actually make after taxes and with a side hustle. This will help you determine your budget.

Apartment Requirements

Figure out what you need and the max that you are willing to pay. Do you need to be close to public transit? How close do you want it to your job? Utilities included? Do they allow pets?

Apartment Research

Find 3 or 4 apartments that match your criteria and list the contact information.

Utlities (if not included)

If utilities are not included in the rent figure out how much they cost.

Other Bills

Calculate how much your bills cost. Credit cards, food, car, and insurance are just a few examples of bills you may have.

And now for the template…

I’ve put this all in an easy to use template that you can customize to fit your situation. Just save it on Google Docs and come back to it again and again! Just click here to jump to the Grad Meets World Moving Out Template

What’s your moving out story?

What’s your story? How did you make the decision? Any tips?

Feel free to sound off in the comments!

Image Credit: Sterin

Amanda Abella

Amanda Abella is a Gen Y blogger, freelance writer and recruiter in training based out of Miami, FL. She is also the author of Grad Meets World: The First Year Out of College and can be found writing for Brazen Careerist, SheNow and more.


2011 Year in Review + Some Changes for 2012


Posted by Amanda Abella

 

College reunion at a roommate’s wedding in California. I’d say this picture sums up the year pretty well :)

I must say that 2011, although tumultuous because I was at a crossroads in my life (AKA. on the brink of adulthood), was a rather good year for me.

Maybe not in terms of relationships (guilty commitment-phobe) or any grand gestures like a dream move to New York City, but mostly in little things that I know will create stepping stones for bigger ones.

I got a better handle on my anxiety which was ripping me apart from the inside out throughout my senior year of college and some time after graduation.

I did new things I’d always wanted to try, mainly yoga. By the same token I strived to start exercising more.

I got reacquainted with city life – which I never plan to leave ever again. Once a city girl always a city girl.

I landed a full time job where I’m actually learning things that will benefit me as I start creating my career.

My net worth is larger than it’s ever been. It’s not anything astronomical but it’s quite a feat for a girl who loves to shop online and had no concept of budgeting. I started with zero and now have investments, a retirement fund and several high yield savings accounts. I’ve also managed to maintain good credit despite some splurging (i.e. a Macbook and the occasional 3 pairs of Express 6-inch heels).

I also acquired more private writing clients as a result of very hard work and dedication. It’s the same hard work and dedication that has made Grad Meets World a success and has served as a platform to launch an ebook.

I made the best of moving back home. I’ve reconnected with old friends and made plenty of new ones along the way.

I became more comfortable in my own skin again as I learned to separate myself from the mentality I’d acquired at a small conservative college in what was quite frankly the middle of no where. I had lost sight of myself for a while and I’m beginning to get it back.

New Year, New Rules

I worked my ass off in 2011 – not only at my regular job(s) but as a freelance writer and blogger. The success I have encountered has definitely been worth it – and I plan to continue writing – but I’ve reached a point where I can start having some fun again. Spending months at a time working 7 days a week is no way to live. In 2012 I hope to kick back more and enjoy time out with friends more often…maybe I’ll also make room for a boy or two lol.

I also need to finally make up my mind on whether or not to move out. On the one hand I really miss being on my own. On the other hand, I wouldn’t be able to sock away as much money as I do now. Something about unnecessarily spending the money I work hard for drives me up the wall – but of part of me knows it needs to be done at some point. Catch 22 if I ever heard of one – I’m sure there will be a Pro/Con list later on to accompany it.

Last but not least, I will finally get through The Intelligent Investor with no long hiatuses. If I’m going to be investing I best damn learn how to do it well.

2012 Goal Setting Templates, Galore!

If you’re okay with where you are and have no intention of making any kick ass changes, good for you. If you’re a personal development freak like me who gets excited about color coding things then I’ve got a list of templates for you.

Grad Meets World Goal Setting Template

First up is the template I created last year in order to help me set my goals for 2011. It really helped me get a handle on my vision and believe it or not it works! I normally save this for my email list subscribers but hey, new years call for goal spreadsheets.

Get Busy Living’s Year in Review

Benny Hsu is not only a contributor for the Grad Meets World ebook, he’s also a phenomenal personal development blogger. This may not be a goal setting template, but it does help you figure out what went right and what went wrong in 2011. If you need some help figuring out how 2011 turned out then check out Benny’s  free worksheet. I swear it’s a goody.

Nicole is Better’s 6 Step Process to the “Eff Yeah” List

Nicole is one of my favorite bloggers. She’s all about going big and – to quote her – living “a life less bullshit.” She’s also a personal development junkie with a HILARIOUS blog. Of course, it was of no surprise to me that she created a 6 step process to making your very own personal “Eff Yeah” list for 2012.

The Art of Non-Conformity Year in Review

Yes, ladies and gentlemen. It’s that time of year when Chris Guillebeau has publishes his world famous Year in Review. Learn the process, take something from your lessons and strive to make 2012 even better! By the way, if you haven’t read the  Art of Non-Conformity book I highly recommend picking it up! It definitely lit a fire under my ass back in 2010.  (P.S. Jose if you are reading this I promise I’ll give it back someday).

Here’s to making 2012 even better than 2011! Cheers!

Amanda Abella

Amanda Abella is a Gen Y blogger, freelance writer and recruiter in training based out of Miami, FL. She is also the author of Grad Meets World: The First Year Out of College and can be found writing for Brazen Careerist, SheNow and more.